Unmothering the Expectations
Mother’s Day is fast approaching, and with it comes the usual wave of pink cards, brunches, and endless messages about how mums should be celebrated. But let’s be real for a second: how many of us feel like the “perfect mum” we see on social media is someone we can actually be, or even want to be?
In a world where society demands that mothers be everything—nurturers, caregivers, housekeepers, chefs, and career-driven superwomen—it’s easy to forget that motherhood doesn't need to fit a mould. Enter the concept of unmothering: a movement that’s allowing mums to step back, reclaim their individuality, and say enough to the guilt, shame, and pressure that often accompany the title of “mum.”
What is Unmothering?
At its core, unmothering is about rejecting the societal expectations of motherhood. It’s about embracing the idea that motherhood doesn’t have to be all-consuming, and that being a good mum doesn’t require you to lose yourself in the process. It’s a rebellion against the myth of perfect motherhood—that unreachable, exhausting ideal we all secretly feel pressured to uphold.
Unmothering is about self-care, rest, and freedom. It’s about making room for your own interests, passions, and needs—without feeling like you’re neglecting your family or failing as a mum. In fact, unmothering often results in better mothers—ones who are more present, more emotionally available, and more fulfilled.
Why Is This a Game-Changer for Mums?
Modern-day motherhood can feel like a juggling act. You’re expected to do it all, and do it perfectly, while simultaneously maintaining a career, a relationship, a household, and a social life. And what happens when you’re constantly told that the key to being a good mum is putting everyone’s needs before your own? You lose your sense of self. You burn out. And worst of all, you feel guilty for needing rest or pursuing your own passions.
But unmothering offers a radical shift. It gives mothers permission to:
Rest without guilt. Whether it’s taking a nap, enjoying a bath, or simply saying "no" to the endless requests, unmothering is about prioritising you.
Reclaim their individuality. A mum is more than her children. She is a woman with her own hopes, dreams, and identity. Unmothering means making space for those things again.
Let go of the “perfect mum” myth. Unmothering challenges the ideal of being the flawless, always-available, self-sacrificing mother. It’s about embracing imperfection and understanding that your worth is not tied to how much you give or how perfectly you perform.
This Mother’s Day, let it be the moment you ask yourself: What would it look like to take a step back from the traditional expectations of motherhood?
How to Start Unmothering This Mother’s Day
If you’re ready to break free from the guilt and pressure, here are some steps you can take today:
Set Boundaries Around Expectations: If you’re feeling the weight of Mother’s Day expectations—whether it’s from your partner, your kids, or even yourself—give yourself permission to say no. You get to decide what this day looks like for you. Maybe you crave a peaceful day on your own, or perhaps you’d prefer to skip the traditional brunch and opt for a solo hike. Whatever you choose, honour what feels right for you, without the pressure of meeting anyone else’s expectations.
Put Yourself First (Even if It’s Just for an Hour): Whether it’s a solo coffee date, an afternoon nap, or 30 minutes of uninterrupted reading, carving out time for yourself is a non-negotiable step in unmothering.
Stop the Guilt Train: Remember, taking time for yourself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so self-care isn’t indulgence; it’s survival. When you make space to recharge, you show up as a more present, patient, and loving mum. It’s not just about you—it benefits your whole family.
Practice Saying No: You don’t have to attend every event, buy every gift, or fulfill every expectation. Start small—if you’re feeling overwhelmed, say “no” to something and feel the freedom that follows.
Breaking Free Starts With You
This Mother’s Day, give yourself the gift of freedom. Freedom from guilt. Freedom from shame. Freedom from the expectations that try to define you. Unmothering is about redefining what motherhood means to you, and choosing a path that honours your well-being as much as your role as a mother.
It’s time to ask yourself: What does your ideal Mother’s Day look like? Is it a day of rest? A day of connection? Or a day spent in complete rebellion against the "perfect mum" myth? The power to choose is yours.
Take the first step towards unmothering and treat yourself to You-Time! Give yourself the gift of the space to reconnect with who you are beyond the title of “mum”. If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, or disconnected from your own needs, we’re here to help. We can guide you to reclaim your sense of self, reduce stress, and find balance.
Throughout the month of March 2025, we’re offering 20% off your first session. Claim this exclusive offer by booking a free consultation call today. It’s your time to invest in YOU and start your journey toward a more fulfilled, balanced life.
Disclaimer: This blog is for informational purposes only and should not be interpreted as a substitute for professional advice.
